Let’s Hear it for the Boys: Helping Single Men Heal After Betrayal

Let’s Hear it for the Boys: Helping Single Men Heal After Betrayal

0Shares0 0 0 0 TweetPocketGender role socialization is such that men have traditionally been raised to consider themselves self-reliant. Those who’ve married women often expect that their wives would be their confidants if and when they choose to share vulnerable parts of themselves; and this pattern holds true for gay men, as well. So what happens then for the man who finds himself grieving the loss of perhaps the only relationship in which he got to be vulnerable? This week, I’ll share healing strategies for single men who’ve experienced relationship betrayal, as well as provide some practical ways that friends can help. The issue of single men and betrayal grief was brought home to me last month when I attended a university presentation about the unburdening that comes with sharing one’s secrets. Toward the end of the presentation, audience members were invited to share one secret on an open mic. A 20ish year-old male presented his story, which went something like, “My secret is that I haven’t been able to trust anyone ever since she left me and broke my heart.” After speaking, he paced about slightly, strode back to his seat, grabbed his things, and moved to the back of the room....

Getting Over Fear of the Dentist

Getting Over Fear of the Dentist

0Shares0 0 0 0 TweetPocketDental visits strike extraordinary fear into the lives of rational and clear-thinking people, leading many of us to avoid the dentist for years or even decades. While a common occurrence, many of us have difficulty pinpointing how and when we came to experience this fear. Mouth trauma, or even simply a lot of nervous emotions it, causes people to avoid dentists even when they are having pain from major tooth problems. Here’s an explanation of why you may fear the dentist and some strategies to help you address this. To start, we’ll break the dentist avoiders into two groups: those who have had mouth trauma and those who have not. The mouth trauma group may be broken into two subgroups: Those who have undergone painful procedures at the dentist office: Probably only a handful of people who avoid the dentist do so because of bad experiences in prior visits. Sure, the scraping of plaque off the teeth, having cavities filled, and any type of mouth surgery and orthodontia are unpleasant, even painful experiences that are no doubt making many of you wince in just reading these words. Avoiding the dentist keeps us at a distance...